Idiom, you idiot.

First off, just enjoy the picture attached up above.  We are awesome.  I look a little like  I belong in fight club, T reminds me of Popeye the Sailor saying “put em up put em up” and L… well she’s just awestruck by our muscles.
You ever think of those sayings…THOSE SAYINGS…that a lot of people know, especially from where I’m from (in the south, of course) and think of funny meanings behind them? Like, where did the saying “colder than a witches’ tit” come from?  Did someone actually identify a real witch? And after this, did they request to feel said tit? Most importantly, was it cold enough (or at all) to use it to compare against other cold things?  I’m curious to see how many people are really comfortable enough that they are just going to walk around talking about witches’ private parts.  Freaks.
Makes ya think, right?
Last night, my best friend asked me what other ways there are to say “angry.”  I start rambling a list of words, beginning with livid and fuming, which he quickly told me were “too strong, too strong.”  I said “mad,” and he looked at me like I’d slapped him with my use of such a mundane, boring version of angry.  Finally, I said….”beside myself – like saying I am so angry I am beside myself.
Then, it hit me. ONE OF THOSE PHRASES.  And because my brain is so special I think it means to be so mad you’re jumping outta your skin and standing next to yourself.  Like maybe  you become so angry that you start to shake and you shake so hard that you split into two kind of like a cell duplicating itself.  Or something.
Also, this whole time I have been perusing the dictionary in my brain, trying to figure out what the name is for phrases like those mentioned above.  Mind you, I’m the daughter of a VERY well-read, intelligent, and cultured english teacher (I’m not sure what culture has to do with this, but whatever, my mother is lovely). I’m sure that at some point in my life she (or one of her teacher friends who became like second-mothers to me) taught me the word for it. I kept wanting to say “cliche” which works…but the word I was really looking for is IDIOM.  I like it because its so close to IDIOT.
My favorite is “who let the cat out of the bag?” I can’t help but imagine Henry David Catreau being let out of a bag that he was being kept in.  He’s a cat so of course he enjoys climbing into bags and boxes – but have you ever closed a box or a bag that a cat is in? It’s scary.  They become little angry pissed off gremlins with satan in their veins and start yowling and freaking out.  Hell cats. They become hell cats, because SOMEONE just HAD to let them out of the bag.

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