Broken Body?

I can’t believe that I’ve let 5 days pass between my last post. What a horrible blogger I am.

***warning: if you don’t deal well with blood and sickness, don’t read this***

I’m riding the metro to work this morning and I feel this small bump on the inside of the right cheek towards the back. Being the fatalist I am, I automatically assumed it was cancer. Of course, I couldn’t help but press my tongue against it. It was the size of one little drop of water…maybe smaller. Maybe a little larger than a cooked piece of quinoa.  Aaaaand, of course I had to touch it with my finger (no worries guys, I used hand sanitizer prior which means my finger tasted like alcoholic flowers).  I pressed again and suddenly my mouth was overwhelmed with a taste of iron. 

Blood. 

I gagged and pulled my digit from my mouth to see the tip of my finger covered in blood. There must have been some on my lip from the process because the scholarly looking grandpa near me leaned over and asked if I was okay.  Thank god for tissues.  I NEVER have tissues. Point for me for being prepared.  Subtract a point because I created that mess in the first place.  This means at 7am, I am currently at 0.  Fresh start, I suppose.

Speaking of psyching myself into thinking I have cancer, I probably should have posted my train of thoughts after my most recent endoscopy.  Yes, I said most recent. Lucky for my gastroenterologist and my urologist (unlucky for me), my body likes to add reoccuring kidney stones and stomach issues (erosive gastritis, irritable bowel, and constant acid reflux) to the list of medical maladies I deal with. I’m 29 and I’ve already had a colonoscopy and two EGDs. Most recently, after having severe acid reflux and indigestion that made it nearly impossible to eat, I found a new doctor and his endoscopy showed all kinds of loveliness.  A gist tumor at the end of my esophagus where it empties into the stomach, severe erosive gastritis, and erosion in my esophagus as well. The doc assured me that my tumor was most likely benign (yay, no cancer!) BUT that I need to see a specialist and have it ultrasounded (apparently, ultrasounded isn’t a real word…screw you Webster) and then removed. I’m on 40mg of prilosec a day, a restricted diet, and I have to drink Gaviscon before meals. Gross. If you’ve never had Gaviscon, its like swallowing something as thick as  Anyways, you best believe that I believe that tumor to have grown and its taking over. Thank you over-anxious mind. Appreciate it!

Two weeks after my endoscopy, I passed blood. There’s nothing scarier than a toilet with your own blood in it. I’ve seen it with kidney stones but never dark blood from my intestines.  And the back pain that accompanied it made me sure that I was dying from the inside out. Couldn’t take anything for the pain either, thanks erosive esophageal gastritic (made up another word) mess. My next gastroenterologist appointment is Monday, so maybe I’ll get lucky and they’ll schedule my second colonoscopy before I’m thirty.  I’m starting to wonder if I could get a new body, this one seems to be broken.

In other news, can it be the weekend yet?

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